#Sarcasm

Hey amateur bloggers, here are some tips from the GOD of blogging – myself to increase your blog traffic 10000X fold.

Journey to becoming the blogging god wasn’t easy. But in my zero years of blogging and years of click baiting, I have learnt many things and helped thousands of people waste time and life on the internet.

I decided to take some time of my extremely, exceptionally, outstandingly busy schedule, to share the secrets to my success. Because as wise people say, sharing is caring and Ad revenue.

So today let’s talk about the top 10 things every blog in the whole of cosmos must have.

The 10 Must haves – Secrets Revealed.

  1. An idiot, who has plenty of time to search the web and click on stupid click bait titles like the one which you have just clicked.
  2. A title that would attract idiots like –
    • Top 10 must haves for every stupid person.
    • 99999999… (and counting) things your brain doesn’t tell you.
    • Why you should visit a psychiatrist today?
    • The ultimate guide to – maybe not being an idiot any more.
    • Signs you might be an idiot.
    • Why no one tells you – you are an idiot and why they should.
    • How I made an idiot out of you with just $0.
  3. Images with captions, so that the idiot can scroll through without reading much and move onto to the many click baits waiting below.
  4. Click on these links, buy those products and make me some money. I have successfully helped you spent your ten minutes, which you could have wasted on something completely useless like getting productive. Now pay me back.
  5. You’re still reading this?, OK congratz, you have earned exclusive access to my new eBook Exploiting Idiots for dummies (just $50) and a free subscription to my newsletter spam.
  6. Me– Well, that’s all folks. Now subscribe to my…Idiot– But it’s only been five points the title told te..Me– What?? Common dude, who really keeps count of these things? Now scroll down and view my new tutorial on The ultimate guide to eating a banana.

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